I HATE PASSWORDS and LOGIN IDs!!!

OK! I know it's for my own good, but can't these companies help at all? John Lewis sent me stupid scraps of tracing paper with barely legible codes and passwords on and I have , of course, burnt them/forgotten them and now I have to jump through a bazillion hoops to get access to my account. What is more, I find some of those 'special private question' thingies REALLY annoying! I must have made a typo on one answer because now the machine argues with me about what my first job was and I find myself shouting at it: 'I know what my first sodding job was! It's my sodding life you are arguing over'. The BG says I must calm down. He says that rather a lot at the moment and it instantly makes me want to blow a gasket....